I Remember You: A Letter to Marvin/My Father.
I remember the moments when you were so proud of me. I remember the moments when my starting to grow up was not the easiest thing for you to handle.I remember when I doubted my own strength and you pushed me past every limit. I remember our last moments together. I remember our last words...
I stand here the embodiment of you. I see mannerisms that I directly pulled from you and know you are with me. I wake up everyday in the house you strived for and wait. I wait for the knock on my door asking for fashion advice, I wait for the non-stop 70's-80's R&B singing at the top of your lungs because once you're up everyone's up, I wait for anything that would allow you to just be in my presence. I just wait...
What kills me most about you not being here is how everyone treats it. Everyone else gets to be sad for .14 seconds and move on, but I, I have to carry you everyday. I don't get to move on because you held me in life and I have to honor you for it. I often hear about how proud you were of me and all the achievements I was getting, but I'm in a pivotal time of my life and the one person who would celebrate me like no other isn't here. My emotions are everywhere especially marking 3 years without you, but pushing through is what you taught me.
I write this letter to you to let you know I remember. Your name draws tears to my eyes, your memory draws a smile to my face, and you soul keeps me grounded. I love you like no other...
Shawn
